Tofu Scramble Royale

Intellectually, all good liberals know that as an institution, the monarchy is an outmoded, exploitative, archaic, imperialist throwback with no meaningful place in a modern democratic state. That said, to a person who spends a fair bit of time reading, writing, and thinking about "Englishness" in general, and about Shakespeare in particular (a writer who spilled his own share of ink on the subject of his homeland), the subject remains compelling, if only for its limitless dramatic potential. More viscerally, as the daughter of an English GI bride and a WWII veteran, there's something oddly stirring about the ceremonial occasions at which the British so excel. Especially since my mother's passing last year, I confess to feeling an emotional thrill at the sense of cultural continuity evoked by a coronation, a wedding, or even a state funeral. (To say nothing of the hats!)

That being the case, I was more than happy to enter into the spirit of the recent nuptials of Prince William and Kate Middleton, at least insofar as it entailed switching on the television and cracking open a bottle at an hour when most people are readying themselves for more virtuous endeavors. To ensure that we were properly fortified for the length and breadth of the spectacle that lay before us, I whipped up this rather fancy tofu scramble, along with some steamed asparagus, toasted crumpets, and our own home-made marmalade. Washed down with a few glasses of cheap champers, it was the perfect wedding breakfast. In fact, it was better than being there: all the pomp and circumstance, without ever having to get out of our pajamas. Cool Britannia!

Tofu Scramble Royale

Ingredients

~ 2 tbsp. Earth Balance or other vegan butter

~ 3-4 large scallions, chopped 

~ 1 pkg. firm tofu, drained and mashed

~ 1 tsp. each: black salt, dill, marjoram

~ 1/2 tsp. each: turmeric, dry mustard

~ A few grinds of fresh black pepper

~ 2 tbsp. nutritional yeast

~ 2 cups baby spinach, chopped
~ 1/4 cup plain, unsweetened soy milk

~ 1/2 cup vegan cream cheese (I used Tofutti)

~ A sprinkle of veggie "bacon" bits (optional)

Directions

~ In a large skillet, melt the butter and saute the chopped scallions over medium heat until soft; about 2-3 minutes.

~ Add the tofu, dry seasonings, and nutritional yeast; cook another 5 minutes, stirring frequently. If things start to stick, you can add up to 1/4 cup of plain, unsweetened soy milk to keep things moving.

~ Add the spinach and stir until wilted.

~ Stir in the soy milk and cream cheese; mix until combined. Continue cooking another few minutes and serve hot, sprinkled with veggie bacon bits, if desired.